It’s the eve of the eve of Christmas eve. I am so excited.
I get to see my babes.
There is a new zelda game. I have a Lizzy around.
I get to make Christmas bread pudding.
I LOVE CHRISTMAS, and just this season. I am so H-A-P-P-Y!
This week of orientation at work we have been having classes galore, and I have been learning so much all about cancer and what I am going to be experiencing on my unit. I am so excited.
I finish my last class of my first semster of my master’s program today. SO EXCITING! 10 credits down. 15 more to go. OMGEEE!
I have been listening to 3 hall and oates songs on repeat for the past week.
It’s been a dream come true.
I got access to the gym here at work so I am going to finally lose my graduate 15.
RIGHT LADIES!?!?!
LOVE YOU SO MUCH!
Also can’t wait to watch one of my number one favorite Christmas movies…ELF.
I really missed the boat this year on the 25 days of Christmas, and then the 12 days of Christmas…so now all we have left is the 6 days of Christmas.
But I am down if y’all are down.
Things have been so crazy. I started my job last week, and I have been in a gnarly graduate course that I finish on Thursday. HOORAY!
It will be alright though.
For this 1st day of 6 day Christmas, here is a letter that I wrote to our Christmas tree, that we got yesterday.
“dear christmas tree,
first of all do you mind if i call you CT? I’m gonna call you CT, I hope that’s alright.
okay, so dear CT,
thanks for joining the family. please don’t let the cats intimidate you, they’ll only be bad if you let them. i wish you would have gotten here sooner but i guess better late then never. right ladies? please don’t fall out of your base and leave too many needles on the floor or mom will get p’ssd, and i will have to clean them up. not cool CT. i promise to water you as long as your good. jkdc, i’ll water you even if your not good. now that’s a promise.
smell ya later (get it, because your a christmas tree…CT you are too much!).
Love,
Melysses.”
Here’s a portrait that I made of CT in microsoft paint.
You guys why are they portraying Santa as a dummy in the media this Christmas? I love Santa. All Santa ever did for me was make Christmas magical.
Let’s just say that Best Buy is totally on the naughty list this year and that’s why they are hating on Santa. FOR NO REASON. All he ever did was bring presents and joy to lil’ girls and boys all across the world, and all he wants in return is good behavior all year round and a plate of cookies, and make Christmas magical. Not asking for to much. The world would be a better place if we gave out cookie plates and good behavior more freely. That’s a fact.
Here are these two horrible commercials, making Santa useless, and making Christmas present giving a competition. BUT it’s not alright.
and what is up with that being wendy from parks and recreation.
These commercials make 0.0 sense.
And Target (which I love the most) is saying, “Santa has elves, You have Target” like you don’t need Santa, because you have Target. I think it’s subtle…but still removing Santa from the equation.
I know I’m already 6 days late for the start of the 25 days of Christmas. I felt by the end of last year’s 25 days of Christmas I was being too cynical. Which was never my intention. I only ever meant to be hilarious and bring a witty commentary to various Christmas hits.
Should I bring them back you guys? I know I can’t do all 25 days, but I can start now…if ya want.
It’s not jermaine dupree…it’s german celebrity crushez yall. the moment everyone has been waiting for. AND I MEAN EVERYONE.
I went on a German kick this past summer. Having crushez on german celebz/real life Germans. UH OH, ladies.
ALRIGHT in no particular order….here they are.
Matthias Schweighöfer – Who I know and love from the understated drama – The Red Baron. HELLO! Except now that I look at him more and more, I think he looks a bit like my newest/only brother in law, Thom. Which is totz freaky deeky and I can’t like Matthias anymore. JKDC. MATTHIAS if you ever leave your long term gf hollar at ur gurl. JKDC!!!! You guyz?!!?!?!
PS I picked the least looking Thom pictures of all…I promise.
But not now. I did this on purpose. TWINZ.
Who’s who. I can’t even tell the diff.
Then Daniel Brühl. Goodbye Lenin anyone?!?!?! Or in my momz case…one of the Bourne MOVIES!!!???!?!?! Yes, Please. So DB is half Spanish. He either looks totz German, or sometimes not as much. Which is why there is one time where I think he looks a lil Diego Luna-esque (Diego luna of latin celeb crushez fame, muy caliente.). It’s rare, but it happens I promise. See.
vs.
Now those are twinz.
But here are just regular-ish pictures of DB.
spaceman.
I guess he is just really a mostly german looking chameleon.
But in this picture I just think he looks like comedy’s rising star, Kyle Mooney.
See.
Ok, next is Gedeon Burkhard- from Inglorious you-know-whats (you guys I can’t say that word, my grandma reads my blog…okay)
Alright, Gedeon…what’s up.
Retro –
And last but not least, this is a shout out to my momz, as requested, the original german celebrity crushz’d himself, Rutger Hauer. Hollar at ur mom. *so someone brought it to my attention that RH is not in fact german, but he is actually Dutch. Should have fact checked y’all. I apologize. But I am going to keep him here, because I don’t know if there are enough Dutch celebs to get their own post. Tell me if there are, and I will do one.
F’realz.
KEEP CRUSH-ing. Stay wild, and german. Did I leave any of your german celebrity crushez out? Lemme know.
love,
melysses s. rant (about all the german crushez).
hollar at your gurl. tell me who else to crush about….or who much you love these dudez.
that is an ode to Ben Folds Live, when Ben folds sings Army and he changes the last line of the song, “I thought about the army”, to “I thought about your mommy”. Love you ben folds.
i made that reference because i was thinking that maybe i could be a military nurse, or military barbie, or something….because for a nurse it’s a pretty sa-weet deal. but unky sam says no because i’ve been on zoloft for a while. whoops. it ain’t no thang though, I will find something else that I can do as a nurse, i am hopeful that everything will work out.
unky sam says no, like “frankie says relax”
now i feel just like Kurt Russell’s character, Lucky, in the 1984 classic, “Swing Shift”. He couldn’t serve his country because he had a heart condition, and I can’t serve mines neither. Lucky and I are so alike.
JKDC.
it’s all good.
so right now i am going to put a hold on the job pursuit, and putting a big focus on my NCLEX preparation. Because it is our goal, and by our, I mean mine, my mom, and you, the reader, for me to pass on the first go. I submitted my paperwork that the school has to sign, and I signed up on with the test peeps and registered for the state of tx. All I have to do now is wait for the OKGO from the state of tx and then I will get to register for a test date. scary spice.
today my nursey friend, who is moving to NJ, had her going away party fiesta at work. I gave her the apron and a mini bop it, and both presents were obvz a big hit. Horray.
Here is a pic of the apron and her fiesta.
I love robyn, and I will miss her so. She is the one person who understands and shares my love for the trashy showtime drama, “The Tudors” but we refer to it simply as, “The Tudz”.
Alright y’all I am going to take a mini nap before work, because who knows if the nap closet will be vacant tonight…the whole hospital probably knows about it now.
I woke up this morning to my one and only ringtone of TI and Usher, “My Life, Your Entertainment”….which always makes me feel like I am straight thuggin….in the best way. I didn’t fall asleep til 5am something. I am pretty much staying on my nights schedule throughout the week. It is becoming easier. That way I don’t have to switch back and forth, making me more tired. Back to my ringing phone already…so my phone is ringing and I look and recognize the number from the School of Nursing, so I answered. I paused a moment to be able to answer in my best most awake voice, even though it was a total farce. I answered the phone and it was my clinical faculty for transitions. There was a group conference today, and I was 30 minutes late of course. I had totally forgotten and had planned on sleeping until 430pm. Or that was what time I had my alarm set for. GEEZ. I am so glad that i answered my phone, otherwise I would have to do some 6 hour research assignment bull or something ridiculous like that. OH BROTHER. When I got off the phone with my clinical faculty I had to log on immediately to the group discussion, and there are about 9 nursing students total in my group, and every week we give a summary of the past weeks clinical experiences to our group. By the time I logged on 7/9 had already talked about there week, and I just had to jump right in and talk about my week with my sleepy voice, and my retainer in.
So unprofessional, so embarrassing.
So grateful that Dr. clinical instructor woke me up, and had me log on.
So grateful for the ability to hear Usher and TI, and the fact that it startled me to awakeness.
so bless’t.
I am back at my clinical tonight, and I am so excited because my preceptor, for the sake of privacy we will call her – Pauline. No one has been named that since the days of little house on the prairie, so you will never guess her real name, or her identity. Take that identity thieves….anyway so Pauline is Catholic. She gave up any sort of sweet treat for Lent. But on Saturday night, at the stroke of midnight when it becomes Sunday…she will turn into a pumpkin. No she will be able to have treats again. So we, and by we I mean I, am going to make it into a treat party. HOLLAR!
So grateful for easter and cavities.
God Bless America.
God Bless Justin Bieber.
Those are just 2 of the things I am really grateful to have in my life right now, Justin Bieber and his music, and America.
Knock this country til you are blue in the face if you want….BUT there are so many good things about it, I am not going to go into all the detz.
I will just say that I have a close friend from the School of Nursing that is doing her clinical transition in labor and delivery on a unit and Uganda. She sends weekly updates, and they are terrifying.
I am so proud of her and what she is doing. Don’t get me wrong….but I am grateful to be here in the states…where we have supplies at the hospital, and the women aren’t expected to bring their own razor to cut the umbilical cord, or a plastic sheet called a cadera – to sit on when they give birth, and get penalized by the midwives and nursing students when they don’t bring them. To me it sounds so scary. The Ugandan nursing students sound like a nightmare. They just watch the laboring women from a distance, and don’t help them, or try to comfort them while they are laboring, and when there is an emergency situation they just laugh at the women who just might be dying. The women are not allowed to have any one with them through the delivery, and my friend has delivered multiple babies are her own already. When I read about what is going on with her, it makes me count my blessings that I can take a bus to the hospital, with little to no fear that there will be a political riot on my way there, and that there won’t be any tear gas going off in route, and that I am not expected to deliver a baby alone, and that when I call for help SOMEONE will come to my aid, promptly.
Alls I’m trying to say is, it’s good to step back and count your blessings.
No offense to the Ugandan labor and delivery unit that they are serving on….I am just not ready for that type of experience in my nursing career right now, and I am so glad to be at JHH.
I love everyone, and everyone deserves a chance to be offered an epidural and get one if they are so inclined, and not be laughed at while they are giving birth in a really scary situation. AMEN.
Love my girl, and I am so proud of her. Please send her and my 2 other classmates your prayers as they finish their Ugandan adventure.
Watch this best 90s clip from my so-called life. I seriously loved the show, why’d it have to end so soon? RIP. I am a sucker for teen dramaz and I don’t know why. Teen at heart? of course.
I watch this boy, Ricky, dance on this clip and I feel like that it is a very similar situation to when I dance. Really intense, and the people around don’t know what to do, because I am having such a good time.
I wrote a passage this morning after I finished my 12 hour shift of clinical.
I want to share it with you. This is like unto some of the notes that I wrote while I was in the airport last summer.
Hair it is.
“Sometimes I leave my headphones at home on purpose to remember what it is like to take in the world around me without my own soundtrack. When I have my headphones with me I usually only pause my music to eavesdrop on people when I think I hear them speaking another language, or if their conversation is in English and they are saying something ridiculous enough that I will want to laugh about with my sisters later, and lastly when I am building up the courage to try to chat up some boy that is way too young and not nearly mormon enough. Maybe that is really bleak, or maybe my life is too influenced by technology but now that I am out here with no headphones I don’t think I have been missing out on much.
How strange? My favorite Asian bus driver with a heavy accent and large yellow aviators drove me to my clinical shift at the hospital last night and here he is again that very same driver to take me home again 12 hours later. This bus was supposed to leave at 7:45. I found out the bus drivers name, it’s Stefano. Perfect. So when I got on the bus this morning he asked me where the nearest coffee shop was, and I pointed the the nearest building and said that there was one on the 2nd floor. It’s after 7:45 and I hope he didn’t get lost.
7:47 – He came back with a cup of coffee and smiled and said, “Is nice coffee shop”. Perfect.
I was so worried he’d get lost in that building and no one would be there to drive the bus. I am not saying that because this is not his native country. I am saying that because this is my native country and I always get lost in that building no matter what.
I always go in trying to find the food court on the 9th floor and I always end up in a Chemistry lab on a floor that doesn’t exist, with no elevator access, and can only be reached by going up one of the secret cloud vines on Mario….or something.
I wasn’t being egocentric, I promise.
Yesterday I had to take my health care provider CPR recertification.
The class was at 1:30pm. But that morning I got carried away waching season 1 of Dr. Drew’s celebrity rehab, and the next thing I know it’s 12:53 and I had to run to catch my 12:55 bus, and of course I had forgotten to eat.
I had to run to catch my bus, like an idiot. The 12:55 bus is always packed, guaranteed, sardine style. I was feeling so weak and out of breath that I had to ask the driver, “Sa-sa-sa-sirr m-mm-mmm-may I sit down on the steps? I think I’m gggggonnnna p-p-p-pass out”. He replied, “Heh-heh….okay”. I was already sitting down after he had said, “heh heh”.
At the next stop I finally announced to the whole bus I needed to sit down, and someone offered me their seat. Then a sorority sister offered me her bottle of water (not a water bottle, but a bottle of avian or dasani or something. who even drinks avian anymore?) and then she said, “you can just have it, I’m done with it” I was too weak to even care about her sorority backwash and I accepted her half drunken bottle of water with open arms. Bless you sorority sister and your kind heart.
The building with CPR class is a few blocks away from the stop on the bus and I am just barely standing. But I know there is a popeye’s half way in between and if I can just get a loaded cajun wrap that everything will be okay. All you need to know is that I did, and it was.
Bless you Popeye’s and your loaded cajun wraps”.
I have tried my hand at song writing again. I used to be able to write songs….but maybe nursing school has drained the creativity from my brain, and turned me into a wannabe scientist. But that probably isn’t true. I got half way through writing a song. I will just make myself finish it. I need to start performing again or something. You wouldn’t know it by my career choice but playing instruments and making music is so a part of me, and I don’t know where it went. I need to start playing my cello again. It was the coolest thing about me, and now the only thing about me is cake for breakfast…
I worked a 12 hour shift yesterday. It wasn’t so bad. I had this one patient that was extremely difficult and I was trying so hard to be patient and understanding, but I felt that I was still coming across as indignent, frustrated, or annoyed, or something. I asked if she wanted to bathe that day and she said she needed me to wash her back. I gave her a back rub when I washed her back and then her heart was softened and she was 1 billion times nicer and easier to work with, and accomodate.
case and point, when it doubt….rub it out.
TMI….sorry, i am going to be a nurse.
I just felt like I needed to share that life lesson. Patients will love you if you give them a back rub. I think that all most people really need is a back rub.
Don’t go trying this out on strangers or anything, but just be more willing to give a back rub and everyone will be really happy. TRUE STORY.
I went to bed at 10pm last night, and I slept 12 hours. I slept through church. I really didn’t mean to. :(
I love working, and I am so excited about graduating nursing school, and starting my transition into professional nursing practice tomorrow on L and D…but truthfully I feel like a lost lil lamb. I don’t know what is next, and that is the absolute worst thing for someone like me who is constantly trying to plan the future. I don’t have a job here. I don’t want to stay in Baltimore. But I have no money and my lease ends in July and I have no plans. The girls want me to move to SLC, and I want to be with the girls. But I can’t even fathom a move right now with no money and no job leads. I would be willing to move home and try to get work downtown at the medical center. But everyone knows that if you move back home you get pregnant and then you get a job at Target, and that is the last thing I want.
Mo’ money, mo’ problems? I think not. All of my current problems would be solved by money, and nothing else….so….?
Needless to say I am overwhelmed with thoughts of the future and what is going to happen. Many of my peers already have jobs. and i am saying, “BUT HOW?”
Can’t I just figure out how to be creative again and do that for a living?
I need to start working on my dance moves, because I am destined to be a video honey…I would rather do that then work at Target.
It’s been a dream come true. 
